Why I’m serving

Dear Family and Friends,

I have decided to turn this blog into letters rather than posts. Mostly this is because I feel it’s more personal and more informal. Also, I think I will write differently when I think about it as a letter rather than a statement or article.

So, this week has been busy as usual. I have learned new things and have a lot of thoughts and impressions that I’m still processing. I’m discovering more about myself and when I can find the time to meditate more about things, I know I will learn even more about who I am and who I am meant to be.

When I first came out to do a service mission, I contemplated a lot about why I was on a service mission and not on a proselyting mission. I know that a service mission is no less noble than a proselyting mission, but I have a long history of being different and questioning why that reality is so. Now, in saying that, I originally was thinking that maybe I was here because I would have some sort of health problem or because I was supposed to help people to learn about service missions or because I wouldn’t be able to handle a proselyting mission. However, in the past few weeks, I have been realizing that I may be on a service mission simply because it will teach me more than a proselyting mission would.

I have never had a problem with sharing my religion. In fact, I remember one point where the only way people could hear me speak for longer than a couple seconds was when they asked about my religion. I was listening to a book on CD by John Bytheway where he talked about what missionaries learn on their missions. I realized that I already do or I’ve already learned most of the things he said missionaries learn on their missions. What I haven’t learned though are things that a service mission can specifically teach me.

I need to learn to love others. I need to learn to motivate myself. I need to learn how to serve. I need to learn to set my own schedule and goals. I need to learn how to dedicate my life to God when the structure is not already laid out for me. But probably the thing I need to learn most of all is how to be the type of person that others enjoy being around because of my Christlike attributes.

Well, all I can say is that I hope I can live up to the calling that the Lord has in store for me. I know that I am imperfect, but I hope that in my imperfection I progressively improve.

I love all of you and hope this week is a happy one for you!

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